April 2, 2014 – 12:44am – Beddinghampshire, Burnaby, BC

I wish I didn’t keep letting so much time pass between posts. Life has just been so busy that I haven’t really had time to think about journalling much over the past while. So, as is usually the case, I’ll try to play catch-up on what’s been afoot as of late.

Most recently (and traumatically?), my 40th birthday was last Wednesday. I am FORTY. Holy shit. How the hell did that happen? People at school and pretty much everywhere keep telling me how they would never guess I’m 40. My reply, “Oh, that’s just because I’m so immature….” lol  The day itself was pretty low-key. Laina gave me three birthday cards including an adorable Snoopy one with one of those 3-D honeycomb paper things like they used to have as decoration in grocery stores and it played the song “Aloha Oe”. Super cute. We went for my free breakfast at Denny’s, then drove down to the States to pick up the lens I bought for my new Canon T5i DSLR (which I got at Christmas when I was in Louisiana). We went to Bellingham to get some stuff for my birthday party which was Hawaiian luau-themed. We got home really late and I had school the next day.

We had my party on Saturday, the 29th downstairs in the party room in our building. About 15 people showed up, so it was the biggest party we’ve had to date. I made Hawaiian pulled pork in the slow cooker (4 pork roasts in two slow cookers, to be exact) and Laina made Huli Huli Chicken which was delicious. We had a custom cake made by, ironically, my dental hygienist. haha It was also Hawaiian themed and turned out really neat. All the usual suspects were in attendance at the party: Shannon, Beverly, Jackie, Mario, Barb, Joyce, Cherie, Jim, Donald from work, Tamara and Cindy, and Laina’s ex Tracy and a friend of hers, Tina.  Shannon and Beverly made a funny Hawaii-themed Jeopardy game and we ate and drank and played Cards Against Humanity. I was exhausted at the end of the day because I had been up all night on Friday working on a video editing project for my PR class. Lack of sleep coupled with frantic rushing around all day Saturday, and the drinking of many tasty mixed drinks throughout the party resulted in me not feeling so great on Sunday morning. I was smart enough to have drunk 4-5 glasses of water and have taken an Advil before I went to sleep, so that probably saved my life. Sunday night, however, I got aura symptoms of a migraine, which recurred on Monday when I was at the clinic for a follow-up with Dr. Tan on my blood pressure. I had never had aura happen more than one time for any particular migraine, so it freaked me out quite a bit. I spent all day Monday in bed resting so it would go away.

Now, you may be thinking to yourself, “Why all the Hawaii stuff?” Well, in VERY exciting news, we are GOING TO HAWAII!!!!  Susan is coming with us and we are going from May 3rd to the 18th. We’re spending 5 days in Honolulu on Oahu, then 10 days on Maui. The first week, we’re staying in Kihei, and the last three days we’ll be in Kaanapali, staying in a condo RIGHT ON THE BEACH! I’m so excited, I can hardly stand it! Probably the coolest thing about the trip, though, is that – unbelievably! – my Dad and Marlene are coming for the 7 days we’ll be in Kihei. I never imagined that I would have the chance to experience an amazing trip like that with my Dad, so I’m uber-excited for all the memories we’ll have a chance to create while there. They were planning to come up here for my graduation in June and when we were talking about it on the phone, I mentioned something about us going to Hawaii and they were like, “WE want to go to Hawaii, too!” I thought they were joking at first, but they both really got into the idea right away and the next thing I know, they have their plane tickets booked and we have our rooms booked and they’re coming! So exciting!

Needless to say, Marlene and I have patched up our issues, for which I am very grateful. I went to Louisiana/Mississippi over the holidays and spent 5 days with Dad and Marlene and it was the most “real” I had ever seen her be. I was amazed when Laina and Susan flew down and Dad invited us all to stay at their house for another couple of days – and Laina and I even slept in the same room together!  I really felt respected and accepted, which felt great. Marlene and I had a “moment” right before we were leaving their house and I really hope things stay good like they are now. She gets on the phone when I’m talking to my Dad and she even wrote something and signed her own name in my birthday card, which was the first time that’s ever happened.

Tonight, I submitted the last of my work for my psychology class and turned in our final project for our PR class today as well. So, I have one more day of classes on Thursday and three final exams in the next two weeks before my career at Langara College comes to an end. It’s a weird mix of a huge sense of relief at finally having some downtime after 28 continuous months of school and a little trepidation about what’s next. I’m planning to take the Carson Dunlop home inspection courses starting in the fall and then finishing my Bachelor’s Degree in Real Estate at UBC via their off-site program. Mostly, though, I’m feeling really uneasy about how I’m going to make more money. Two days a week really isn’t cutting it and I need to find a way to make more while still being able to finish the courses I still plan to take. Annoyingly, the Student Loan people don’t consider any of the courses I’m planning to take (including the ones at UBC – wtf?) to constitute full-time or part-time studies, but rather continuing studies, so my student loans will become payable in 6 months. That feels VERY stressful!

Overall, life is pretty damned good at the moment. I do still struggle with negative thought patterns, self-doubt and fear and such, but I try not to let it stop me from moving forward. Some days, that’s easier than others.

I have to work in the morning and I’m tired, so I’ll sign off here for now.